10 Things to let go of in 2014! Quote from this website…
“8. Guilt. Everyone makes mistakes. It’s part of life and learning. I’ve done things I’m not proud of but feeling guilty years and even decades later is not healthy. I can’t change the past, pure and simple. I can, however, get over it. As I mentioned before, I control my thoughts. It may be hard but it can be done. Instead of causing myself emotional pain for my wrongdoings, I can use them as a learning experience and change my life accordingly. I didn’t breastfeed my first son. He’s 7 now so it’s a little too late. I still feel guilty at times for giving him the bottle. That’s silly. He’s healthy and happy. That should be all that matters. Guilt does have a purpose but harboring that emotion way after the fact is not purposeful at all. Forgive yourself and move on.”
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After 67.5 years on the planet, I have lots of stuff to feel guilty about… Each day of the year is a relative guilt trip for me… We were conditioned as kids in our home to feel guilty for just about everything. During my life feeling guilty about success was even a trigger. I never deserved success! I believe excessive guilt is a sign of moral injury of some sort resulting from too much beating yourself up for stuff. What is scary is that so many of the things we are feeling guilty about, we have no control over. Even when there is forgiveness of self along the path of healing, “guilty as charged” is haunting to us guilt lovers. Frankly, I am tired of feeling guilty about lots of stuff! Feeling guilty about so many life events and things becomes stupid at my age. So, in 2014, as a priority, I am going to work very hard at not feeling guilty about stuff that happened in my life. This is not a New Years resolution! I am calling it a continued work in progress with more emphasis on going forward. My goal, like so many of my aging boomer cohorts, is peace of mind. Freeing myself of guilt completely before leaving this wonderful life behind me is a good thing… I have made great progress the last few years, but need to work a little harder to achieve a feeling of ultimate peace with myself.
All the best, and peace of mind, to everyone in my circle of life during 2014 and the years to come!
Steve Sparks
Author
Reconciliation: A Son’s Story click to order…