What happens to building a lasting love life following severe trauma?

by | May 19, 2014



Building loving and lasting relationships…

Regaining your love life…  Quote from this website article from World of Psychology…

“Reciprocation is the safe way to let go of fear and build trust in a relationship without being vulnerable. He or she does something nice, you do something nice back. He or she opens up about something personal, you open up about something personal. Great relationships are built over time where trust is developed by continuous positive interactions.”


For most of my young adult life, it was very challenging to be completely open and comfortable with dating.  Trauma can cause a person to be both emotionally numb and to lack self confidence.  I had a poor self-image for many years that hindered my chances of experiencing deep love and affection.  My early relationships didn’t work out very well at all.   Growing up in a toxic home circumstance where there was little or no trust did not prepare me well for building loving relationships.  I had no idea how to relate intimately.  Nor did I really understand what love was all about.   In later years all the discomfort changed with maturity and in finally finding my soul-mate who showed me what true love and friendship was all about.  My wife, Judy and I just celebrated our 30th wedding anniversary by renewing our vows recently over a long weekend in Cannon Beach, Oregon.  I am a very lucky guy, especially in these later years of my life to have such a wonderful partner…

What I have learned is that being ignorant of the basics of a healthy relationship, and the potential damage of post trauma symptoms to building intimate relationships, is that awareness and treatment would have been a big plus for me as a young man.  I may have avoided making painful mistakes that affected others and myself.  The article, 3 Steps in Regaining Your Love Life Following Trauma by Emily Avagliano, is a good bet to memorize and take to heart sooner rather than later for trauma survivors.

Steve Sparks, Author, My Journey of Healing in Life After Trauma and Reconciliation: A Son’s Story…

Please support my mission of helping families who suffer from PTSD and moral injury…order my books, My Journey of Healing in Life After Trauma, Part 1… (Kindle $2.99), and Reconciliation: A Son’s Story.  Click and order paperback or download Kindle version.  Buy my book at Barnes & Noble as well… Thank you! Steve Sparks, Author

About the author

Steve Sparks is a retired information technology sales and marketing executive with over 35 years of industry experience, including a Bachelors’ in Management from St. Mary’s College. His creative outlet is as a non-fiction author, writing about his roots as a post-WWII US Navy military child growing up in the 1950s-1960s.
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