Why is it critical to pay attention to healing children who are emotionally neglected? The emotional baggage of kids will carry forward well into adult years!

by | Apr 26, 2014

Please support my mission of helping families who suffer from PTSD and moral injury…order my books, My Journey of Healing in Life After Trauma, Part 1… (Kindle $2.99), and Reconciliation: A Son’s Story.  Click and order paperback or download Kindle version.  Buy my book at Barnes & Noble as well… Thank you! Steve Sparks, Author


The hidden scars of emotional abuse are visible in numerous behavioral ways.

Healing for Emotionally Abused Kids…quote from this website article by Karen Hellesvig-Gaskell, Demand Media and Global Post

“Emotional abuse of a child, otherwise referred to as psychological maltreatment, can range from blatant acts such as verbal abuse, terrorizing or victimizing to more subtle but equally damaging deeds like rejecting, ignoring or neglecting a child. Some parents emotionally abuse their kids because they were victims of emotional cruelty as children, the American Humane Association explains. The sooner an emotionally abused child gets the help he needs to heal, the better his chances of recovery and negating the cycle of abuse will be.”

Helping kids affected by emotional neglect…  Quote from this website article by Growing up Easier Publishing…

Being Called Stupid, An Idiot, Bad, Ugly; Frequently Belittled And Unacknowledged:

Without help, a child or youth’s self-confidence disappears. Later success in learning, living, relationships, and being an effective parent is extremely difficult. These actions are often related to parents and teachers who need education, support and therapy so they can be more patient and attentive to the child or youth. Some adults discharge their stress onto children & youth by acting abusively.


My parents consistently “discharged their stress” on us siblings and they didn’t know the consequences.  It was the sign of the times during the 1950’s and early 1960’s during my childhood and young adult life.  Families tried to “suck it up” following the trauma of WWII and Korean War when out in the public.  When in the privacy and secrecy of home, parents often released the bottled up stress on the kids and each other.  Years of this kind of emotional and physical abuse will affect children well into adult life.  Unless treated as quickly as possible the emotional baggage is carried forward creating the next generation of highly stressful behaviors resulting in the outward symptoms of Post-Traumatic Stress, including anger and severe anxiety.  These next generation grown-ups become troubled parents who discharge their stress in the same way as their own parents.

My life as a child and young adult was very much focused on surviving one day at a time.  As siblings we demonstrated anger toward each other most of the time as a way to release the built up stress as kids.  We felt ignored and neglected.  It seemed as though we lived in a loveless home.  We didn’t dare talk about our fears at school and had a difficult time with being self-confident around our peers, teachers, and coaches.  Each day we wiped away the tears and put on our game faces when we walked out the front door of our home.

The level of awareness regarding the consequences of emotional neglect and child abuse is exponentially better in the 21st Century.  It is almost impossible for parents to not know how “discharging stress” in abusive ways at home harms children.  It is also safer for kids to talk about their fears outside of the home.  The caring and educated community culture of today looks at protecting children, but also considers the importance of helping parents help themselves before it is too late.  Communities everywhere try to help each other to prevent families from imploding under the pressure of dysfunctional circumstances.  We know now without a doubt that healing children and families sooner than later is far less costly than denial and ignorance.

Please take advantage of opportunities to increase your awareness as parents and children by spending quality time reading and referencing resources i.e., “Growing up Easier Publishing” and engaging with other parents in your local community.

Steve Sparks, Author, My Journey of Healing in Life After Trauma, Part 1 and Reconciliation: A Son’s Story…

About the author

Steve Sparks is a retired information technology sales and marketing executive with over 35 years of industry experience, including a Bachelors’ in Management from St. Mary’s College. His creative outlet is as a non-fiction author, writing about his roots as a post-WWII US Navy military child growing up in the 1950s-1960s.
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